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Motherhood Update: Sky at 1 year

October 27, 2020

No one has ever loved a smash cake as much as Sky did at his little, socially-distanced party this weekend. 

Saying: Sky says Mama, Dada, all done, and “meow” (when the girls are pretending to be cats). He also loves to roar like a lion, and is probably saying hi and more, but mostly we’re still in the phase of insistent shrieking in order to communicate needs over here (ha).

Eating: Sky loves to eat (much like his mama, daddy, and sisters). He generally dives face-first into whatever is put in front of him (I’ll be posting the video of him with his smash cake on Instagram — it’s hilarious), but he has a special affinity for avocado, fruit, and Mexican rice and beans (smart kiddo).

Sleeping: Sky is still sleeping well for the most part, though his molars are still sporadically causing some sleep strife here and there. I’m hoping to wean him sometime in the next two months, so hopefully that doesn’t disrupt things too much!

Doing: Right in line with his sisters before him, Sky is chattering away right now and is clearly frustrated that he can’t communicate verbally yet. I remember this phase being particularly difficult with Prim and Lark as well (the 12-15 month span, in particular) because they can understand so much but communicate so little. I am trying to remember that this too shall pass (this is definitely one of the hardest ages for me, parenting-wise) and enjoy the sweet parts of this age, but some days are tougher than others (having Sky melt down anytime he spots me when I have to run downstairs for something during work hours is not ideal).

Latest milestone: Sky has mastered getting up and down the stairs in our front yard now (thanks to a lot of practice during his outdoor birthday party this weekend). He is very physically determined — much more so than the girls at this age. He hasn’t started walking just yet, but can fully stand unassisted for long periods, so I’m sure he’ll get there just as soon as he sets his mind to it.

Favorite toys: Sky is mostly interested in anything the girls are playing with and any items contained in the kitchen cupboard. Honestly, he would be happiest if we just let him capture our cell phones, TV remotes, and topple over any water glasses in the vicinity. His other favorite pastimes are pulling clothes out of dresser drawers and climbing into any box or laundry basket that happens to be on the floor.

Sweetest things: Sky is kind of attached to me at the hip these days. Prim and Lark went through this phase around 12 months as well — separation anxiety, stranger danger, and mama-attachment seems to all come together into a very clingy few months around age one, which while challenging, isn’t without it’s upside. I’m certainly getting lots of sweet baby snuggles these days.

Favorite thing about this age: Sky loves music and seems especially drawn to The Nightmare Before Christmas soundtrack. The girls are obsessed with the film and score right now, so it’s played pretty much daily in our house. When one of the songs comes on, Sky will often throw his hands in the air and dance with enthusiasm — it’s so pure and sweet! 

Baby / Birthdays / Sky

Happy Birthday, Bub!

October 26, 2020

Dear Sky,

I can’t believe you’re one! What a year, whew… Somehow this year has felt like the longest and shortest year ever. Just when we were really getting into the swing of things with you, the world went into lockdown due to a global pandemic. I mean, if you asked me the most outlandish thing I could think of — this wouldn’t even make the list of things I could have conceived of prior to 2020.

You’ve had quite the first year, too — you emerged into this world so quickly (good lord, even I was blindsided by the swiftness), and speed seems like it might just be part of your personality at this point. Everyone who meets you remarks how quick you are — how fast you can zip out the door and climb the steps on all-fours, how quickly you spot an open gate and beeline straight for the opening, and how you seem to have a sixth sense for when anything off-limits (like cell phones, remotes, or drinking glasses) are out and within your reach. 

Even though being home with everyone for the past 7+ months has had its challenges, one of the upsides has been being able to mostly escape the plethora of viruses that likely would have made up much of your first year. You caught RSV at just 7 weeks old and you and I ended up spending 4 very stressful nights at Oakland Children’s Hospital together as a result. I spent every minute with you there while Daddy drove back and forth multiple times a day, juggling caring for us and the girls simultaneously. I hated having you hooked up to so many tubes and monitors, and the only time I was ever able to get you to take a pacifier were those first 10 hours when they wouldn’t let you breastfeed because your oxygen support levels were too high to allow for it. You weathered the hospital like a champ (better than your poor Mama, even) and were finally discharged when you no longer needed oxygen support.

At first we thought you might be our quiet, introverted child, but man were we wrong — you are just as eager to be a part of the conversation as your two chatty sisters. You yell and squeal through dinner, making it very clear when you want “more” or “water.” 

Your sisters make your face light up, and you’re so eager to join in on whatever they’re doing. You love Mama, Daddy and Morgan, showing your affection with the sweetest, tightest hugs, and planting big, open-mouthed kisses on our faces. 

Larky gave you your nickname, because she would gush all over you, cooing “Bubba Skyyyy.” You’re now known as Bubba, Bubs, Bubsy, and Bubbers. Daddy loves to call you Sky Guy, while I often refer to you as babycakes (which I’m sure you won’t find embarrassing at all when you’re older).

You have made our family feel so full and wonderful, I couldn’t imagine life without you. I love you so much, Bubs, and I just can’t wait to see what year two will bring.

Love, Mama

Baby / Motherhood / Sky

Motherhood Update: Sky at 11 months

September 28, 2020

Am I freaking out a little bit over the fact that this kiddo is less than a month away from turning one? Maybe. Probably. I mean, definitely. HOW HAS IT ALREADY BEEN ALMOST A YEAR??? It’s fine. We’re fine. 

Saying: Sky officially said his first word just before he hit 11 months, and even though I was really rooting for it to be “Mama,” he followed in his sister Larky’s footsteps and hit us with not just a first word but a first phrase: “All done.” 

Eating: If you’re wondering why both Lark and Sky’s first words were “all done,” it’s because this is what we ask at the end of meals (we ask and sign “all done or more?”) — and the fact that two of our three kiddos first words revolved around mealtime, you can guess where food ranks in this house. (Honestly, it’s one of my dreams that my children grow up to love food as much as I do.) Sky loves to eat and will often out-eat even his sisters at dinnertime. He is obsessed with salmon (a favorite of everyone in this house), avocado, and I think could probably take down an entire watermelon if we gave him the opportunity.

Sleeping: Sky is still sleeping through the night for the most part, with just a few disruptions here and there when teeth are coming in. The last two nights he’s slept until 7:45am (he goes down around 7:15/7:30pm) which is AMAZING. I doubt this will last, but I’m gonna go ahead and take that win while I’ve got it.

Doing: Sky is so busy and is determined to get into anything and everything these days. We recently invested in all new kitchen appliances (just buying our way out of the pandemic over here…) which has been really helpful for keeping Sky out of things. He previously would immediately grab things off the bottom shelf of the fridge and try to climb into the dishwasher to grab everything in sight, but our new freezer-on-bottom situation and two-drawer dishwasher is not so easy to get into, so there’s less “remove Sky to the playroom and race back to try to complete the task before he’s able to speed-crawl back into the kitchen” happening now, which has been nice.

Latest milestone: Sky is on the verge of saying more words (I think he likely has “Mama,” “Dada,” and “more,” but I like to wait to count words until I’m totally certain they know what they mean and use them in context.) He can also stand unassisted, so I’m sure first steps are just around the corner.

Favorite toys: Sky is obsessed with trying to grab everyone’s cell phone and any remote that’s within reach. As a result, we’ve lost the remote so many times that I finally invested in some Tile stickers to keep track of it.

Sweetest things: Sky loves to give sloppy, open-mouthed kisses all day long. He usually saves most for me, but our nanny was telling me the other day that he was being so silly with her while she was laying on the floor trying to do some stretches — “he was climbing all over me and kept putting his mouth on my face.” I started laughing and informed her that he was kissing her. It’s simultaneously a little disgusting and the sweetest thing ever (much like parenthood!)

Favorite thing about this age: Sky has so much personality now. I initially thought he might be quieter and more introverted than the girls, but he has proven himself to be just as loud, wild and silly as they are. He loves to yell and laugh his way through the day (much like the girls), and while I do sometimes lament the lack of “quiet” in our house, I would choose this insanity over the alternative any day of the week.

Baby / Motherhood / Sky

Motherhood Update: Sky at 10 months

August 24, 2020

I realize that I am so far behind on updates about little Sky, but as with third kids and living through a pandemic… I mean, what is there really to say? Life is crazy and we’re all just trying to muddle through as best we can, right? 

Saying: Sky has been saying variations of “Mama” and “Dada” a lot, but I’m still not convinced that he’s using them correctly to refer to KC and I. I’m holding out hope that Sky will say Mama first, since both Prim and Lark said Dada first (and Sky is a true Mama’s boy through and through right now — so, fingers crossed!)

Eating: Sky is a champion eater, and just like Prim and Lark at this age — eats like a truck driver. His current favorites are all forms of pasta (my little Italian!), watermelon, avocado, and pretty much any type of summer fruit.

Sleeping: Sky sleeps really well, for the most part, though he’s been getting his teeth at a fast and furious pace (he already has 6, with a couple more on the verge of breaking through), which can often disrupt things a bit. Most nights he goes down around 7:15pm and sleeps until 6/6:30am. Some mornings he will go back to sleep after I come down to nurse him, while other days he doesn’t — so we’re still straddling the world of one vs. two naps over here, just depending on when the morning started. Luckily, even if he’s up early, we can plop him into the girls room (if they’re awake) and he will happily play with them until breakfast time at 8am (I mean, that right there is maybe exactly why I had multiple children).

Doing: Sky is all over the place and into EVERYTHING. He is so much more mischievous than the girls were at this age (um, today he climbed all the way up the stairs because the gate at the bottom wasn’t closed. Yes, ALL THE WAY UP THE STAIRS.) He crawls at lightening speed, pulls up on everything and cruises around the furniture like a pro. He’s obsessed with trying to get into the fridge, rummaging through the liquor in the bar cart, zipping out the front door, and of course, trying to get up the stairs. I’m just trying to brace myself for the next couple of years with this kid because JEEZ, DUDE, CALM IT. 

Latest milestone: Since I’ve failed to update the blog for the last 10 months, there are a lot! He crawls, stands, cruises, babbles, climbs, feeds himself, sleeps through the night (hallelujah), and has nursed like a champ from day one. My favorite (and most recent) development though is he’s started dancing. Since we can’t go outside right now due to the wildfires, we have nightly dance parties so the girls can get their wiggles out before bedtime. Sky loves the Pirates of the Caribbean song (from the Disneyland ride) and will get up on his knees, throw his hands into the air and dance — I literally can’t think of anything cuter, honestly.

Favorite toys: Sky loves laying on pillows right now and climbing into Lark’s bed and playing with all her stuffed animals and books. It’s so sweet to peek in on him and see him snuggled up on Larky’s bed, happy as a clam.

Sweetest things: Sky can now “ask” to be picked up by getting up on his knees and lifting his arms. It’s so sweet to see him make a beeline for me or KC and throw his arms up so he can get a little snuggle.

Favorite thing about this age: Sky’s personality is really coming out now. He is such a happy, easy-going baby and very rarely gets upset. He is so great at going with the flow (third kid!) but I suspect he’s going to be a little daredevil as he gets older because he wants to do everything his big sisters are doing!

Baby / Motherhood / Personal / Pregnancy / Sky

Party of Five

November 4, 2019

Meet our newest bundle, Sky Casey Deatsch! Sky arrived on October 23rd at 1:15am, 12 days ahead of schedule. 

If you’d like to know how it all went down, please read on! I should note that this was not my favorite birth experience (thanks America!) and much like my other birth stories — it’s nice and long.Given that I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes this pregnancy, I already knew that I wouldn’t be allowed to go past my due date (which was today — happy due date, Sky!) My doctor had already scheduled an induction for my due date, in the event that this little peanut hadn’t arrived by then.

Given that both Prim and Lark were early (and I’d been having lots of contractions and pre-labor starting at 36 weeks this time around), I was fairly certain that I wouldn’t make it to my due date. I was hoping to go into labor naturally and had already discussed doing a sweep at 39 weeks if I hadn’t already delivered, as I had had this done with Lark after a lot of pre-labor and ended up delivering less than 24 hours afterward.

However, just like all good birth plans, mine flew out the window when I went in for my 38 week appointment on October 22nd.

My appointment was at 2:15pm on the 22nd, and I had spent that whole morning sleeping. Our nanny was watching the girls that day and I had no plans until the afternoon, so I opted to catch up on some much needed rest (the end of pregnancy is super exhausting!) I basically rolled out of bed, threw on some clothes and had a super quick lunch before heading out the door with my mom, as we had plans to go look at kitchen appliances after my appointment (our fridge had been acting up).

We parked at the doctor’s office only to find a voicemail on my phone telling me that the midwife I was scheduled to see was at the hospital for a delivery and so would need to reschedule my appointment. I tried calling the office but no one answered due to it being their lunch hour still, so I opted to just head up to the office to reschedule in person.

Some background before I dive into all this: I had been thinking about delaying my Tuesday appointment to Friday all week, as I reasoned I could opt for a sweep then (closer to 39 weeks), but ultimately decided to just wait the additional few days and get the sweep on Monday, the 28th, when I officially hit 39 weeks. I was trying to make it to 39 weeks with this kiddo while simultaneously avoiding giving birth on Halloween, as I wanted to be around for the girls that day. 

If I could do any of this over, I would have just left the parking lot and left a message with the doctor to reschedule for Friday, but y’know, at this point I had zero idea what was to come.

I headed upstairs to the office and was informed that they would fit me in with one of the nurses. I almost forgot to leave a urine sample and so rushed into the restroom to deal with that and then was immediately whisked into a room when I walked out, where the assistant took my blood pressure.

She noted that my blood pressure was elevated — 142/80. Up to this point it had been higher than normal, but never above 130/85 (140/90 and above are where it gets to be an issue), and I had been monitoring it at home due to my history of preeclampsia with Prim. I should have asked to be re-measured after being allowed to sit quietly for a bit, since I was rushed into the room and immediately measured, but I didn’t.

The nurse came in to check me and informed me that protein had been detected in my urine and because I had a high blood pressure reading I needed to head to labor and delivery at the hospital for further tests and monitoring, as these things together indicate preeclampsia. I stupidly assumed that because my blood pressure readings had been fine at home that they would run some tests and likely send me home — surely they wouldn’t induce me based on a single blood pressure reading that wasn’t even above the 140/90 threshold.

At the hospital I was hooked up to fetal monitors, fitted with a blood pressure cuff, and my blood was drawn. My blood pressure was measured every 15 minutes, and due to white coat syndrome and all the activity (nurses coming in and out and telling me repeatedly that I would probably have to stay and be induced), my blood pressure readings were high. (The best example of this was when a nurse came in and told me that even though the baby was doing fine on the monitor and my bloodwork had come back completely normal, my midwife was still recommending induction. Like clockwork, the stupid blood pressure cuff went off right after I heard this and registered 150/85. COOL.) I was eventually able to get my blood pressure down to 125/80 as I waited for my midwife to come talk to me, and so remained hopeful that I would be allowed to go home and self-monitor.

My midwife finally showed up around 6pm (roughly 4 hours after I arrived at L&D) and informed me that even though my bloodwork was fine and baby was responding as expected on the monitor, she was recommending immediate induction. I had already communicated that I wanted to avoid induction at multiple appointments prior to this, and tried to explain that this felt extreme given that this was being based on a few high blood pressure readings and a single urine test (I also explained that I was sure I was super dehydrated as I had slept literally all morning and so had had zero water since the night before.)

I asked to delay induction in favor of doing a 24 hour urine collection (a more accurate measure for protein levels/preeclampsia diagnosis) and self-monitoring at home. This seemed reasonable to me, as I had been monitoring my blood pressure on my own anyway and had even managed to get my blood pressure down to a reasonable level on the monitors at the hospital, but my midwife informed me that my only option outside of induction was to stay at the hospital and do the 24 hour urine collection while remaining there on the monitors. I felt trapped, as the monitors were extremely uncomfortable, and I knew that staying in the hospital would just bank more high readings due to my stress level and discomfort, giving the doctors more ammo for their induction decision. I pleaded with the midwife to let me go home. I said that I could do the urine collection at home and routinely take my blood pressure and could call if I got a reading of 140/90 or above. I asked for a sweep to see if that might kick things off and I could go into labor naturally and said I would agree to induction if the 24 hour test showed a need for it, but this way I could at least get my stuff together, see my kids, and get into a better headspace for something that was very much not in my birth plan.

But the answer was no. 

The midwife then called in the perinatologist for an ultrasound, who noted that the baby’s growth had slowed and my amniotic fluid was on the low side of normal. I wish I had known at the time that both of these things are normal at the end of pregnancy and that dehydration can affect amniotic fluid levels, but I didn’t. The perinatologist agreed that I should be induced and so all other options were taken off the table. I was told that if I stayed at the hospital I would be induced and if I wanted to leave I would need to sign an AMA.

So I “agreed” to the induction. (I’m not really sure how else to put that, as it very much felt like I had no other choice.)

I was upset, not so much because this was not the plan, but because I felt like the midwife and doctors were not listening to me at all. They kept telling me that this decision was based on the “whole picture,” but to me it felt like it was being based on a couple of possibly inaccurate tests and no one was even willing to delay things for a day or two to see what additional tests would say.

KC and I made overnight arrangements for the girls and KC went home to grab my bag. I was brought into a birthing suite where they broke my water and started me on pitocin sometime between 9:30 and 10pm. (So much for a “gentle” induction — they came in every 30 minutes to turn the level on my pitocin drip up.)

I tried to rest while things were still bearable, but the contractions picked up and very quickly were coming hard and fast. Sometime around 12:45am I told one of the nurses that it felt like the baby was getting low and I felt like I was fairly far along. At this point the contractions were so intense I could barely breathe through them. I was trying to relax, but they were so painful I could feel myself tense up with each wave and I was shaking due to being in so much pain. I asked to be checked because I kept telling the nurses that it felt like I needed to pee (they kept telling me to tell them if it felt like I needed to use the bathroom y’know *not pee* but I kept telling them it didn’t feel like that, I just felt like I had to pee). I finally got checked around 1am or maybe just before, and the midwife told me I was 5cm. I was a little surprised, as I felt like I was at least approaching transition, but took her word for it and told KC shortly after that I wanted an epidural. I figured if I was only 5cm I would probably be laboring at least another 2-3 hours (as I had been 2-3cm dilated when the induction was started, and so had only progressed a couple cm in a matter of about 3 hours). At this point the contractions were extremely painful and pretty much unmanageable and I felt I couldn’t go on like this for hours and hours. I knew I wouldn’t be allowed to eat once I had the epidural and I was STARVING, so I asked for food first. I had some juice and Jell-o and crackers and then asked for the epidural.

The anesthesiologist took what felt like forever to get into the room and get set up (in reality, I think it was 5-10 minutes). At this point the contractions were coming every minute or so and I could barely speak in between. I sat on the edge of the bed while the anesthesiologist set up behind me and sterilized my back. He kept having to stop while I would have a contraction, as I would shake uncontrollably from the pain. He stuck a big sheet of plastic to my back and was about to numb me before placing the epidural when I had another contraction. Mid-contraction I felt like I was going to pee the bed, then quickly realized nope — this baby was coming NOW. I screamed “I NEED TO PUSH!” and basically — shit got REAL.

The nurse yelled at the anesthesiologist to move his stuff because I needed to lay down. She pushed me onto the bed, hit the red button on the wall (which I assume is the “OH SHIT” button that calls for backup) and I felt the baby crown and then birthed his head in one push. There was a break at this point where I came-to for a moment — KC was holding my hand and leaning right over my face, telling me to breathe (thank god I had told him before I gave birth that if I was pushing without drugs I needed him to be right in my face telling me to breathe. The midwife in Amsterdam had done this when I had Lark, and it was SO helpful to have someone to focus on during pushing, as pushing without drugs is so intense and scary.) I heard the nurse telling someone else “I’m holding his head” — she didn’t have time to get gloves on and was holding him with the hem of my hospital gown. She was yelling at me to grab my legs, which I finally was able to comprehend and did, right before I did one final push and out he came. 

Sky was lifted onto my chest and I opened my eyes to see a mass of people rushing into the room — my usual nurse who had been on break, my midwife, a few support nurses and the pediatrician. I wasn’t sure exactly what had happened, as it had all happened so quickly. Somehow I had managed to dilate from 5-10cm in a matter of 15-20 minutes and then pushed twice and had a baby. I looked at the nurse who I remembered had been in the room when I was supposed to be getting the epidural and asked if she delivered the baby, “Yeah — with her,” (pointing to another nurse), she said.  “She caught him because I didn’t even get gloves on.” Sky was born at 1:15am, less than 4 hours after my induction started. He was 6lbs and 1.4oz (a peanut, just like his sisters) and 19.5 inches long. I literally have no pictures of Sky and I doing skin-to-skin immediately after his delivery because I think we were all in such shock from his swift arrival. KC didn’t have the time or wherewithal to get the camera or even his phone out in the minutes before or after Sky’s birth, and I just remember holding him and shaking while everyone rushed in the room and congratulated us. While I still feel frustrated by how everything came to pass leading up to Sky’s arrival, I’m glad that we’re all healthy and no worse for wear. (Poor Sky had some facial bruising due to his quick delivery, but I was rewarded with zero stitches after the fact — praise be.) It was a whirlwind for sure, but he’s here and healthy and very much loved by his mama, daddy and big sisters. Welcome to our family, Sky. We’re so happy you’re here!